Time for Another Nine
What are you doing after life returns to “normal?”
by Abbey Algiers
As I spend each day writing and teaching remotely from my home, I often think about what I’ll do when this quarantine lifts. My husband has the same thought. Like the rest of the world, our routines have been disrupted, and while we’re so grateful to have jobs, the way we do them has changed. We both miss our co-workers, I miss my students. I also miss my Saturday runs with my bestie, and later doing things like shopping, getting my hair done, and other “essential” (but really non-essential) things. Most of all, though, we miss our parents, kids, and friends. In reality, I can do without most of the “things” I miss, but not being able to hug my 92 year old mom and 94 year old dad, and other family has been the absolute worst.
So really, at the top of my “after the quarantine list” is to SEE MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS.
To expand on that top priority, let me say that when I do see these people, I plan to be 100% with them. I cringe at the thought of how many times in the past I was “with” these people, but also in another world, namely - my phone. I find it ironic that now this very device is my only means of connecting with those I love the most.
Who would have thought?!?
The quarantine has made me think about how I want to change after things get back to normal. For example, if I’m at a birthday party, you can bet I’ll be at that party instead of snapping pics for my virtual report later. If I’m golfing, I’ll stay on the course, with my foursome, focused on my game. I won’t be on my phone, and I’ll try not to be preoccupied by worries off the course or thinking about what I’m going to do next. Whatever I’m doing, I’m going to try my best to appreciate the people and the moment.
During the quarantine, I’ve also realized that some of the things I thought were so important to buy and/or do, are really not that important. I’m learning that more can be done from my home, giving me more time to spend with others later.
So, the question remains, what will YOU do after things return to normal?
It’s time for some “home”work! (Remember, back in the first paragraph I mentioned I was a teacher. )
- Right now, without thinking about it too much, make a list of who you want to see and what you want to do when this is over. Your list can be as detailed or brief as you like. Your list might include ideas such as:
“Go to my grandma’s and eat one of her chocolate chip cookies while I sit at her kitchen table” might be one… or you could just say, “Visit my grandparents”
“Talk to my friends outside school again.” “Go to the driving range with my teammates.”
- As you make your list, notice what feels important to you… are there common themes? Does your list contain more people and activities than things?
- When your list is complete, look at it again and think about the people on it. Even though you can’t see some in person now, you can still make memories and have moments with them. Here are some ways to do this:
- Call your grandparents or relatives often. Ask them questions about their lives like you’ve never done before. Use FaceTime, Google Hangouts, or something similar, and have them coach you through an activity. Maybe have your grandma help you “virtually” bake cookies, your grandpa advise you on your putting stance or help with a home project.
- Speaking of grandparents, are there any elderly people near your house that could use help? Offer to rake their yard, take out their garbage, or simply send them a card to know you’re thinking of them.
- Plan a virtual meetup with your friends or golfing pals - maybe have a backyard putting or chipping contest.
- Think about what changes you want to make when you’re finally able to go back to school, return to golfing, play other sports, and do all of the things you miss. Will you take these activities more seriously? Will you put forth more effort towards that subject you’ve been struggling with at school? Maybe try a new sport or activity, and drop one that you now realize you’re not missing at all?
These times are hard in so many ways. But, there’s beauty to be found in even the most troubling times, and these moments give us the opportunity to reflect and think about who we want to be when we come out on the other side. It truly is up to you, the actions you take and the path you follow. The good news is that you can plan for that new path today and consider your many, many options for a brighter future.